People Are Going to Talk — Give Them Something Worth Talking About

Cue the music to Bonnie Raitt’s Something to Talk About.
“People are talkin’, talkin’ ’bout people…”

I don’t know about the rest of the country, but in the South, I constantly hear women say, “I couldn’t do this or that. What would people say?”

Let’s face it — people will always have something to say. They’ll question your choices, whisper their opinions, and pass quiet judgment on whatever you choose. Are you living a life that makes you happy and fulfilled?

So why not give them something worth talking about?

Let’s be honest: the people who will talk about your choices aren’t paying your bills. They’re not awake at 2 a.m., wondering if this is all there is. They’re not the ones carrying the weight of your quiet longing. Now to let you in on a little secret…

What They Think Isn’t Your Problem

Here’s what I’ve learned: what people think of you is none of your business — and it isn’t your problem.

Whether you stay quiet or step fully into your light, someone will have something to say.

Their commentary reflects their fears, not your future.

You Write Your Script

Too many women start to feel invisible as they age, not because they’ve faded, but because the world stops looking.

A friend of mine signed up for a belly-dancing class. Her adult children were mortified. That wasn’t what they thought a respectable woman in her 60s should be doing. She went anyway. She laughs more now. She moves differently. She gave her kids something to talk about! I’m thinking of joining her.

You’ve spent decades being appropriate, polite, helpful, and predictable. You edited yourself to fit what made others comfortable.

But now? You get to decide. You get to be bold, curious, even outrageous if you want to. You don’t owe anyone an explanation. It’s time to write a new script — one where you are the author.

Redefining Audacity

Back in my corporate days, we tossed around the term B-HAG — Big Hairy Audacious Goal. I always hated that phrase. Why did ambition have to be hairy?

Then one day, sitting in a loud meeting full of ideas and energy, it hit me: I’d been audacious all along. I just hadn’t claimed the word.

Now I do.

My version of BHAG? Big. Honest. Audacious. Grit.
Not perfect or polished. Just honest and brave. It takes some grit to age disgracefully!

Audacity isn’t about being loud — it’s about being honest with yourself about what you want, what you’re done with, and what still makes your heart beat faster.

It means:

  • Saying yes to what lights you up
  • Saying no to what drains you
  • Taking up space because you’ve earned it

Dye your hair purple. Start the business. Travel solo. Say no to energy vampires. Say yes to what makes you feel alive.

You don’t need a reason beyond: because I want to.

My Secret Garden

My front yard faces an old golf course. Not many people walk by. But the ones who do sometimes say, “It’s a shame no one sees all this work.”

But I see it. God sees it. My dog-walking friends see it. The hummingbirds, bees, and butterflies definitely see it.

It feeds them. It feeds me.

My garden is my living painting — a new canvas every spring. Kenny Payne and I have been planting together for 40 years. We always say we’ll scale back — but we never do.

We plant for the joy of enhancing the beauty of God’s creation, not the attention of passersby. And that’s enough. That’s the secret — when you create for love instead of applause, the beauty multiplies.

So ask yourself:

  • What brings me joy?
  • What have I been holding back?
  • What would I do if no one were watching?

And then — do that.

Say Yes to You

Say yes to showing up. Say yes to the version of you that’s been on pause.

This isn’t rebellion. It’s liberation.

You don’t need to shrink to be loved.
You don’t need to wait for approval.

You choose you.

What have you been dreaming of doing that would make tongues wag? Let me know!